Anything is possible in 2012

I'm not so hot at writing about my FEELINGS. Even though that's what lots of blogs are all about, I don't like getting too personal on the internet. Especially if it's a downer. But it's no secret that thanks to depression and anxiety, I have a lot of "bad days" that complicate my life and hinder my ability to be awesome at all times. It's something that I've been working with for about ten years, and it's no fun, but I get a lot of help. People have been really kind and generous (gross! I just quoted a Natalie Merchant song) to me this year, and I feel more supported than ever before. 

from Cut it Out Art on Etsy

 After over a year in therapy with an awesome Amazonian therapist who bears an uncanny resemblance to Dr. Beverly Crusher, brings up Jesus Christ Superstar all the time, and helps me with simple things like goals and decision-making, I feel like I'm in control as much as I can be.

How does it work? I have to look at each new day as an opportunity to start fresh, because oftentimes I'm not too jazzed about the day that just went down. It really is a day-to-day thing. It has to be. I'm tired of jinxing myself by saying, "I think I'm better now. Yup, it's all uphill from here," after a week or a month of being "okay." Then, the next shitty day I stay in bed or can't summon the strength to go to the post office seems like even more of a failure. The idea of being "better" is not really a goal anymore. Like the Buddhist buddies say, just being is a good way to go.

 

The reason I'm bringing all this up is because I recently Tweeted about some of my depression hassles, and a kindred spirit sensed my need and sent me the above piece of art. Just out of the blue! Just to be nice! I've had this incredible gift in my house for over a month now, and I'm just so overwhelmed by the gesture that I haven't written about it or even said thank you. So, THANK YOU, Shana Hampton! It really means a lot to me.

A classic beauty from Shana's shop, Cookoorikoo

I think the more we share about these challenges and make connections with each other, the less alone people (people = me!) will feel, especially in this blogosphere made up of pretty pictures. Behind every Instagrammed tablescape or perfectly photographed vintage find is a real person. I'm one of them!